- Be honest
Speaking truthfully is always the best policy
2. Be respectful
Respect individuals and their space. Treat others as you would expect someone to treat
you and don’t try to force your opinion down their throat. Also, don’t criticize or judge
their point of view.
3. Listen—don’t do all the talking
Effectively communicating means listening to the other person intently. When you listen to someone it shows that you respect their discussion points. It may not work out to a 50/50 mix, but a 60/40 mix will go a long way to having a successful outcome. Never do all the talking. If it’s all one-sided you may not get the outcome you desire.
4. Be real
If you portray phony mannerisms your counterpart will turn the discussion off in a heartbeat. Individuals who display an authentic demeanor will be effective communicators.
5. Be mindful of your voice
It’s not just what you say, but also how you say it that matters. The sound of your voice can change the perceived meaning of a message. Ensuring your voice matches the meaning of the message is important. For instance, relaying negative information with a cheerful voice can be rude and offensive. At the same time, being mindful of your voice is important to help prevent underlying messages from coming through that should be kept private. For instance, if you are assigned to tell someone they are being promoted but personally feel they are bad for the job, you will need to be mindful of your voice to ensure your annoyance is not conveyed. A person’s voice is made of the following components: articulation, pronunciation, tone, pitch, and projection. Each of these components requires practice for success. The following are a few quick ways to improve your voice:
Speak clearly
Don’t mumble or speak too quickly—articulate and pronounce your words carefully to ensure your counterpart can understand your message.
Don’t be monotone
Use the pitch, volume, projection and even inflection of your voice to emphasize words as needed and keep a listener engaged. The size of the room, the number of people being spoken to, and even the length of your message are some factors to consider when determining how to use these aspects appropriately.
Always pay attention to the tone of your voice
Don’t come off as unapproachable. Be passionate, upbeat and enthusiastic when appropriate.
6. Watch your body language
Practice in front of a mirror and watch your facial expressions, body stance, eye contact, and posture. Keep in mind culturally appropriate maintenance of space and touch as well. Along with what you say and how you say it, what you don’t say can be even more important. In fact, research shows 55% of communication is made of non-verbal cues and is important as it conveys what a person is feeling. For example, a person yawning is often interpreted as boredom.
7. Be aware of your emotions—stay neutral
Don’t let your emotions obstruct your message as negative emotions will create barriers. If you seem down, impatient, have emotional outbursts or promote negativity you will always lose your audience. You know when you’re having a good day, a so/so day, or a bad day. Therefore, before initiating an important conversation make sure to leave any negativity at home. Think of the positives in your life to help re-direct your focus. If this isn’t possible, then it’s best to re-schedule the encounter. If rescheduling isn’t an option and being positive is coming off as fake, get through the encounter by maintaining a neutral demeanor. A neutral demeanor means not getting too excited or displaying negativity in your voice. Neutrality along with being mindful of your voice and body language will help you get your message across appropriately.
8. Do not beat around the bush
For general conversations get to the point quickly without ever being rude. It’s important not to waste anyone’s time. For highly sensitive and especially unfavorable conversations you may need to sugar-coat your words a bit. However, being sensitive to the others person’s feelings does not require you to be long-winded; you can still deliver the message in a timely fashion.
9. Be polite
Say please and thank you throughout your conversation at appropriate times.
10. Be complimentary
Giving compliments works wonders as many individuals don’t recognize their strengths. When deserved, being nice and giving praise is very important to have a meaningful discussion.
11. Don’t pry and don’t get too personal
Self-explanatory.
12. Facilitate private discussions in person (if applicable)
Never email or text important discussions. If possible, discuss highly sensitive issues in person even if this delays the conversation. It’s important to view someone’s facial expressions to be able to adjust the conversation as needed. If meeting in person is out of the question, say you live in a different city, then a phone call is the next best thing.
13. Know your audience
Who is the person or audience you will be speaking to? Learning important “general” cultural, religious, or even local information before the meeting will help you better prepare. For example, knowing the city’s favorite sports teams or popular food items will help you better engage your audience. While learning about their culture will help you avoid behaviors that may be discouraged. If acquiring this information before the encounter is not possible, try to arrive early and speak to the early arrivers or even open the conversation with some general questions: “What do you do for a living? What are your goals and hobbies?” Be genuine when asking these types of questions and be sincerely interested in their answers. Although no two people are alike, look for unities between you and him/her. If there are some commonalities build on them.
14. Electronic communications
In addition to the tips above, always respond to text messages and emails. One of my biggest pet peeves is when people do not respond. Give the other person the respect of a response, practicing cordiality and accuracy. They took the time to email you, what makes you too important to respond!
